Which is why The Patriarchy does not want us to have them

Mr T and I were on a trip. As usual, we were sharing one suitcase. I took my shower (ha that makes it sound like I shower daily, which is not true except when I am staying in someone else’s house – I love the freedom of not having to go to a job) and got dressed, grabbing the jeans that lay across the top of the suitcase.

When we were downtown, I put my hand in my pocket – and my hand was not stopped three inches in.

I pushed further – and my hand still had space to move.

Further.

Until my hand was BURIED in my pocket.

I ran another test.

I put my phone.

In my front pocket.

And

It

Fit.

That’s when I knew something weird was happening.

And indeed, I had accidentally put on Mr T’s pants.

For those few moments, I knew what it was like to have power.

And I liked it.

---

Mr T, alas, would not let me keep those jeans.

But I am not without skills, so I simply transplanted a pocket from a pair of his old jeans that I used for parts to a pair of my jeans.

And it worked.

However, it was a pain in the neck and I am lazy and don’t want to do all that work and indeed I should not have to.

So I wrote to Levi’s to ask them to GIVE US POCKETS.

I had to transplant a pocket from my husband’s jeans to mine because men’s jeans have pockets deep enough to hold a phone and women’s jeans have pockets deep enough to hold a quarter. What the hell? Why can’t you give us the same pockets you give men?

Texan in Exile who is tired of worrying about losing her phone in the ladies’ room at the ballpark where she is not allowed to carry a purse

They wrote back.

Apparently, I alerted them to an issue that THEY HAD NO IDEA EXISTED.

Thank you so much for taking the time to share this with us. We completely understand why it feels disappointing. Pockets are a real, everyday need, and it’s upsetting when something so simple becomes a limitation.
 
Your feedback is really important to us, and we want you to know that we take it seriously. We truly appreciate you expressing your concerns so openly, and we will make sure your comments are shared with our team. Hearing directly from customers helps us understand where we need to improve, and your message highlights an issue that deserves attention.
 
If there’s anything more you’d like to share or anything we can do to make your experience better, please don’t hesitate to let us know.
 
If you need anything else, just reply to this email or chat with us. Texan —we’re always happy to help!
 
Samantha from Levi’s

So you may all thank me – Levi’s is ON IT. They JUST DIDN’T KNOW BEFORE.

Also it’s about time people started using the M Word in public

The NaNaz are punk band of menopausal women. One of their songs is about menopause. In a story about the band, the female reporter, who is a Woman of a Certain Age, writes, “Symons has since written her first song, Harness the Darkness, which is surprisingly upbeat given that it’s about the unreasonable anger one can suffer during menopause.”

Unreasonable anger.

Unreasonable.

Oh honey.

---

I have never heard my mother talk about menopause. Not once. I don’t know when hers started. I don’t know if she ever had a hot flash. I don’t know when my grandmothers went through menopause.

All of this would maybe have been useful information to me as I boiled my way through hours of trying to sleep. Or not. I don’t know.

But at the least, it should have been a topic that was freely discussed. After all, it affects just HALF OF THE ENTIRE POPULATION.

---

One time, when I told Mr T I was having a hot flash, he laid his hand on my forehead.

“You’re HOT!” he exclaimed.

“Well yes,” I answered. “That’s why it’s called a hot flash.”

“I thought it was something you felt,” he said, “but I thought it was like phantom pain, not that your body actually changed temperature.”

---

We are hot.

We are miserable.

And yes we are angry.

But it’s not the hormones – it’s the awareness.

It’s the awareness that first of all, medical science knows almost nothing about menopause. Why is that, you ask? Oh because women’s health is consistently de-prioritized so we can have not just viagra but chewable viagra for men who want to get it up but whose jaws aren’t strong enough for regular viagra.

It’s the horrified awareness that we have been right all along – that the things that happen to our bodies just don’t matter to the white men who allocate the research money.

It’s the awareness that our suffering isn’t important enough for men to care about it and do something about it.

That makes us angry. Not unreasonably angry but justifiably angry.

And because with heat comes DGAF, we are speaking up. We are demanding that something be done, not just for us but for all women at all stages of life. We want pregnant women to get the healthcare they need. We want Black women not to die in childbirth at a higher rate than white women. (We don’t want any women to die in childbirth.) We want women to have power over what happens to their own bodies. We want endometriosis cured. We want what we deserve.

We are angry. As we should be.

How long must they suffer?

What should we do? What should we do in a world where white men are being treated so badly? So unfairly?

I mean – look at the data.

They have no representation in the halls of power. Where are the men in Congress? In the White House? In the CEO seats?

Look how many laws restrict what men can do with their own bodies. Look at how public facilities are closed to them. Look how they are de-prioritized in medical research.

Oh wait.

That’s women.

That’s people of color.

What is the suffering that white men are enduring?

It must be something. In my college’s alumni page on facebook, people were talking about where their children are going to college. One White Guy said his kid is going to Texas A&M, which is kind of the opposite of Rice, where I went to college. That is, A&M has a military corps. It’s known as the right-wing school and my college is known as the pinko school.

He is not sad that his kid is not going to Rice. At Rice, I guess, his white male child would face challenges for being a white male.

White guy: Mine is going to A&M.

(Reply) I’m sorry. It’s still a good school though.

White guy: As Rice used to be. Before the woke Kool Aid took over. My father and grandfather were Aggies. I was born in BCS. So it was a bit of a shock when I went to Rice, but at least it wasn’t TU!! Rice was perfect for me in 1979. Quirky, intellectually curious, open-minded. Lots of smart people having fun and working hard. My offspring has the added challenge of being a white male. Since that seems to automatically make him a PNG at Rice these days, and since he wants to pursue a military career, I encouraged him to consider A&M, where humans like him are still valued. Along with all other human variants.

What are those White Male Challenges, you ask?

Let’s see.

Maybe it’s something as tragic as not being called on first in class.