Guess whose clothes have 1. pockets 2. big enough to hold things.
We are going to a concert and as I was about to fall asleep last night, all the worries and questions that stay hidden during the day rushed to the front of my head as they do because why on earth could a concern about my dental insurance or whether Mr T had paid the health insurance premium or will my tooth rot out of my head before I figure out what to do wait until morning when I could actually do something about it?
A question that also came to mind and blocked my sleep was “Can I take a purse into the concert?” a question that never would have occurred to me years ago but after the baseball park debacle of ’21, it has to be an issue.
And of course I cannot take a purse into the arena.
The Fiserv Forum FAQ page helpfully tells me that I can take a wallet smaller than 4″ x 6″ x 1″.
OH THANK YOU SO MUCH FISERV FORUM! I can fit my phone, my money, my ID, my glasses, my keys, and my meds in that wallet!
BTW – just asking – what do I do with that wallet once I have stuffed everything into it?
Do I hold it in my hand? Because one of the joys of a purse is that it has a handle that allows you to hang it on your shoulder, which means you have not one but two hands available for other life activities.
Do I put it in my pocket?
Oh dear Fiserv Forum. Once again, we see what happens when a group containing only men makes a decision that affects everyone.
Because guess what Fiserv Forum?
WOMEN’S POCKETS HOLD ALMOST NOTHING.
Only 40 percent of women’s front pockets can completely fit one of the three leading smartphone brands. Less than half of women’s front pockets can fit a wallet specifically designed to fit in front pockets. And you can’t even cram an average woman’s hand beyond the knuckles into the majority of women’s front pockets.pudding.cool
Oh I hear you telling me I can put things in my back pocket.
Dear, dear Fiserv Forum.
Have you ever tried to pee with a phone in your back pocket?
WAIT NO OF COURSE YOU HAVEN’T! You can pee with your phone in your front pocket – where it fits – and if your front pocket is full, you can put the phone in your back pocket, where it’s still fine because YOU ARE PEEING STANDING UP.
But if I – a woman wearing clothes designed by people who clearly hate women – have to sit to pee (which is how this world works), then I must lower my pants and guess what?
A phone in the back pocket will fall out.
Why do you hate women, Fiserv Forum? Why?
BTW, I won’t put a credit card or cash in my back pocket because of pickpockets and it won’t fit into my front pocket, so I guess I will not be spending any money on concessions.