When men make all the decisions and the decisions benefit only them

Guess whose clothes have 1. pockets 2. big enough to hold things.

Hint.

NOT WOMEN.

Mr T, putting his phone in his front pocket, where it fits and will remain undetected until an X-ray, much like a root-canaled tooth that has started to rot and your previous dentist, whom you left because he was a Trumper who says face masks for his staff are a “personal choice,” failed to detect and was not discovered until your new dentist took new X-rays. To make it even better? You had the Good Insurance with the old dentist but now have coverage only for cleanings and cavities.

We are going to a concert and as I was about to fall asleep last night, all the worries and questions that stay hidden during the day rushed to the front of my head as they do because why on earth could a concern about my dental insurance or whether Mr T had paid the health insurance premium or will my tooth rot out of my head before I figure out what to do wait until morning when I could actually do something about it?

A question that also came to mind and blocked my sleep was “Can I take a purse into the concert?” a question that never would have occurred to me years ago but after the baseball park debacle of ’21, it has to be an issue.

And of course I cannot take a purse into the arena.

The Fiserv Forum FAQ page helpfully tells me that I can take a wallet smaller than 4″ x 6″ x 1″.

OH THANK YOU SO MUCH FISERV FORUM! I can fit my phone, my money, my ID, my glasses, my keys, and my meds in that wallet!

BTW – just asking – what do I do with that wallet once I have stuffed everything into it?

Do I hold it in my hand? Because one of the joys of a purse is that it has a handle that allows you to hang it on your shoulder, which means you have not one but two hands available for other life activities.

Do I put it in my pocket?

Hahahahahahaha!

Oh dear Fiserv Forum. Once again, we see what happens when a group containing only men makes a decision that affects everyone.

Because guess what Fiserv Forum?

WOMEN’S POCKETS HOLD ALMOST NOTHING.

Source – read the whole thing

Only 40 percent of women’s front pockets can completely fit one of the three leading smartphone brands. Less than half of women’s front pockets can fit a wallet specifically designed to fit in front pockets. And you can’t even cram an average woman’s hand beyond the knuckles into the majority of women’s front pockets.

pudding.cool

Oh I hear you telling me I can put things in my back pocket.

Dear, dear Fiserv Forum.

Have you ever tried to pee with a phone in your back pocket?

WAIT NO OF COURSE YOU HAVEN’T! You can pee with your phone in your front pocket – where it fits – and if your front pocket is full, you can put the phone in your back pocket, where it’s still fine because YOU ARE PEEING STANDING UP.

But if I – a woman wearing clothes designed by people who clearly hate women – have to sit to pee (which is how this world works), then I must lower my pants and guess what?

A phone in the back pocket will fall out.

Why do you hate women, Fiserv Forum? Why?


BTW, I won’t put a credit card or cash in my back pocket because of pickpockets and it won’t fit into my front pocket, so I guess I will not be spending any money on concessions.

4 thoughts on “When men make all the decisions and the decisions benefit only them

  1. Well, Goldie, if you were just sleezy enough you could get some of those leggings with the phone pocket on the side and voila. Well, you do have to wear your glasses and stuff a $10 behind the phone in the oh-so-flattering built in pocket. And, how the heck can it possibly be comfortable? But that’s a question for another day.

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    1. webb, I have those leggings and when I read your comment, I was wearing them. But I have discovered that they do not keep me warm enough outdoors – it was only 19 degrees on Saturday. 😦 Otherwise, that would have been a great solution.

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  2. When I was a teen, a choir trip required shorts of at least a specific length. Were there *any* shorts for teen girls of that length available in stores? No. So! Skate/surf boy shop, behold there were shorts, and THE POCKETS. So many pockets, they all worked, and none of them were uncomfortable. I loved, loved, loved those shorts.

    Doesn’t work as well after you get definite hips, but man. Men’s clothes are just *so much better* in so many ways. Women tolerate a lot of discomfort for style and silhouette (the number of conversations I have had about shoes that don’t fit my friends “but they’re so cute! it’s worth the blisters!”)… but also, much of the time, because there aren’t other viable options…

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    1. I guess one of the good things about getting older – and about the pandemic – is I don’t wear clothes that hurt anymore. Mostly because I have no patience anymore but also because nobody sees me. 🙂

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